Remarks in memory of John Aldrich Sly The reasons one might hesitate to speak in memory of John Sly may say as much about him as would any affirmation. I feel hesitant first because I might accidentally say something condescending, and lightning might strike this very church. John detested condescension. I feel hesitant because when someone dear to me dies, I want to feel I have been cheated. But seventy-eight years is within the normal portion, and we have not been cheated, and John would have been first to point this out. I feel hesitant because I do not want to let go of my denial that a friend so wise, so gentle, and so generous is gone. Finally, I feel hesitant because I only knew John for the last decade and a half of his life when his first career as an educator of prominence, and the raising of his children, and countless other things of which I have no experience and cannot speak lay behind him. I can speak, however, from the standpoint of a grassroots environmentalist in need - as any younger person attempting to accomplish something in the public forum must be - of advice, of feedback, of opinion, and of guidance from an intelligent, experienced, committed elder. The word mentor is overused, but not among us here today. Always available to give advice, seldom offering it unsolicited, John kept me advised on how Save Barnegat Bay's message was playing in his neighborhood - and his neighborhood was comprised of both Forked River and the world. John previewed almost every written word that went to the public in the name of Save Barnegat Bay, offering powerful suggestions on content and style. If John were here to read this talk, it would be more succinct. I liked to introduce John as "my friend who has been to every country in the world except Papua New Guinea". And then John would say, "No, no, I've been to Papua New Guinea." And I would exclaim, "He's been to every country in the world!" And wherever John had not been, or whomever he had not met, he had likely encountered through his love of the written word. Somewhere along the way - or in many somewheres - John managed to convert his great experience into wisdom. In remembering John it is important to recall that wisdom does not follow automatically from great experience. Experience makes some people cynical; some it makes selfish; and many fools die of old age. One knew instinctively - and occasionally one learned anecdotally - that moral suffering played a role in John's acquiring wisdom. Among the things this true friend taught me is that it may not be necessary to know all the fires through which a friend has passed. It can be sufficient merely to rejoice in the result. I imagine John before I met him as a sort of provincial in search of a province. And wasn't it our good fortune that ours was the province John chose. John Sly, more than any person I ever met, was a small 'd' democrat. His belief in the inherent worth of each and every individual was a fierce, inspiring, religious conviction. For each of us working on causes locally - whether it is a rail trail, or an oak-pine forest, or a vernal pool, or a bay - the battle is always uphill. The question occasionally arises in the mind of any activist, however devoted, as to whether the battle is worth fighting. It means much when a man who has seen the world - who has experienced West Africa, and Lebanon, and Paris, and London, and Grinnell, and Harvard - and who has dealt with the mighty and with the low - affirms in word and deed that, yes, what you are doing here in Ocean County does matter; that your work is right; that if the world is to become more sane, the sanity must begin in some specific place, in some province; and that this place, Ocean County, is not merely "as good a place as any", but rather it is the very best place to wage the fight - not only on account of its lovely bay, and its peaceful woods, and its worthy humanity, but because it is where we are. It is with gratitude for all these things and more that I remember our wise and generous friend, John Sly. Wm. deCamp Jr. October 3, 2004